Provided Press Release
Dee Norton Child Advocacy Center, the region's leading resource to prevent abuse, protect children and heal families, is offering suggestions for communicating with children about recent events. Many children may experience sadness, worry, confusion and anger when learning of the senseless death of George Floyd during an encounter with the police. Children may have seen graphic videos both of the death and of subsequent community reactions, some of which include intense emotions and in some instances, violence. Children may experience strong reactions as they process the news and may turn to trusted adults for help and guidance.
“To prevent abuse, protect children and heal families, we must understand the context in which they live. For many children and their parents, this context includes discrimination, fear and violence,” said Dr. Carole Swiecicki, Executive Director of Dee Norton Child Advocacy Center. “We stand hand in hand with those who are willing to prevent further abuse, protect children and help our community heal. While we do not have all of the answers, we acknowledge that these injustices do happen and that they have an impact on families we serve, our staff, and our community.”
To help children understand today's current events, here are some strategies for how to talk with them about what happened.
Start the discussion:
- Talk about the incident with children/teens. While this is a difficult topic, this is an important time to share family values and model appropriate conversation around hard topics and feelings. Before sitting down with a child, it might be beneficial to talk with other adults to process what adults are hearing and to address a parent's own reactions. With traditional and social media, teenagers likely have heard about the senseless death of George Floyd, and others before him, the peaceful protests and the rioting/looting. Provide a level of information and discussion that is appropriate for the child's developmental level.
Gently correct incorrect information:
- Take time to provide the correct information in language the children/teens can understand. Teens may also want to talk about situations where they have experienced or witnessed discrimination or hate.
Encourage children/teens to ask questions and answer questions directly:
- Children may have some difficult questions about the recent events or similar experiences they may have had. For example, a child may ask if it is possible that an encounter with police will lead to death for them or their friends. Be open and honest in acknowledging any reasonable likelihood of this as a risk. However, they are also asking if they are safe. Therefore, this is a good time to review plans the family has of assuring safety in the event of any crisis situation. Include any information the parent may have on efforts being made to assure safety. Like adults, children/teens are better able to cope with a difficult situation if they feel they have the information they need to be safe.
Understand common reactions:
- Children/teens may have different reactions to these events. Problems with attention and concentration may arise. Increases in irritability and defiance may be present. Children and even teens may have more difficulty separating from parents, wanting to stay at home or with other caregivers. Worries and anxieties about what has happened, what is happening, what may happen in the future, and how this will affect their lives are common. As this event and other hate crimes are discussed across our country, children/teens who were not directly affected may have anxieties that “it could happen to me or my friend.” Sleep and appetite may also be affected. Support from the parents will help with feelings of safety and security.
Limit adult conversations:
- Be mindful that children/teens are sensitive to the parent's stress. Know that they also listen to adult conversations. Children may not understand all adult conversations and will fill in the blanks, many times with inaccurate information. While the recent events have raised concerns for adults, have discussions about feelings and thoughts with other adults out of the child's or teen's presence.
Limit media exposure:
- For preschool and elementary school-age children, there is truly no “good” amount. For older children and teens, they will likely have contact with traditional and social media. The younger the child, the less exposure to media there should be. Consider limiting the family's exposure to media .
Be patient:
- In times of stress, children/teens may have more trouble with their behavior, concentration, and attention. Even if they may not openly seek understanding or support, they will want this. With adolescents who are searching for an increased sense of independence, they may have trouble asking for support and help. Children/teens will need a little extra patience, care, and love.
Extra help:
- Should reactions continue or at any point interfere with children's/teens' abilities to function or if a parent is worried, contact local mental health professionals who have expertise in trauma. Contact the family's physician, pediatrician, or state mental health associations for referrals to such experts.
As a Children's Advocacy Center with core values of Compassion, Collaboration, and Commitment to Excellence, Dee Norton stands with both victims and law enforcement to have hard conversations to make things better.
To learn more about how to help communicate to children in the wake of current events, visit www.deenortoncenter.org. The website also includes relevant pandemic resources, including tips for speaking with a child about the outbreak.
About Dee Norton Child Advocacy Center
The Dee Norton Child Advocacy Center is the region's leading resource to prevent abuse, protect children and heal families. Primary services include forensic interviews, medical examinations and mental health assessments as well as immediate support and coordination. The center also provides evidence-based therapy to child victims and their families. For more information, visit www.deenortoncenter.org.
